Self-talk is actually the thought patterns you focus on – some are positive while others are highly negative and can do the most damage to your confidence level.
Negative self-talk may also be a factor in depression and anxiety issues.
Changing your thought patterns from negative to positive may not be easy – especially if you’ve practiced negative self-talk all your life and have low self-esteem.
But, you can change the way you talk to yourself and improve your confidence level. Here are some things you may want to try:
- Be realistic in your self-talk. To tell yourself you’re dumb or ugly is a negative self-talk pattern which can be overcome by assessing your real assets. Chances are, you’ll find that the words, “dumb” and “ugly” are words which don’t fit you at all. Play up your virtues and play down your faults.
- Be kind to yourself. Showing yourself some compassion is like commiserating with a close friend who’s going through a difficult time. What would you say to that person? Say the same to yourself and build your self-esteem and improve what you think about yourself.
- Weed out old messages you’ve been hanging on to. Messages you may have received from your parents, advertising and other forms of media may be detrimental to your confidence level and overall well-being. The way you weed them out of your mind is simply not to think about them. As they begin to sneak into your consciousness, immediately replace them with positive thoughts.
- Learn to recognize disempowering thoughts. Sometimes, we may let thoughts take over our minds which do nothing for us – in fact, they take away our power. Learn to recognize these types of thoughts and also learn how to kick them out of your thought process.
- Focus on the big picture. Negative thoughts tend to focus on the here and now rather than the big picture of your life. Don’t waste your energy on thinking about things you can’t do anything about – like traffic jams or losing your job. Instead, focus on the future and how you can get to where you want to be in a few years.
- Avoid people and messages that put negative thoughts into your mind. These thought can come from people who drain your energy and cause you to lose focus and also from all forms of media who plead with you to look and be a certain way.
These thoughts can cause actions which may derail you from confidence and happiness. Cull them out of your mind and learn how to talk to yourself in a positive manner.